Monday, June 13, 2011

13 June 2011

It is hard to believe I have been off work for 13 weeks now...It has gone by extremely quickly! Got to make the most of my last week! :) Which also means CYFs only has 4 days to get themselves organised for before and after school care for the kids if they are to stay any longer with us...

We went to see the counselor again today... it was good to talk through things I guess but neither of us are really finding it necessary at the moment... I wished we had done it earlier, but I think we have come through alright by ourselves... We haven't made another booking with her but if we find we need to in the future we can... For me now, Lily is a happy memory, sure there are moments that I am sad, and there are times that are hard, after all I lost a very precious life, a whole life, when I lost my daughter. But when I think of her, the memories are happy. I am not in denial, I know it sucks, I know that there were some not nice times, but while I won't forget them, they are not what I think about when I think about Lily, instead I remember watching her in scans wiggling in every way possible to make it hard for the scan technician! I remember her choosing her name. I remember her responding to my touch, to my voice, to Luke's raspberries... I remember how much I LOVED carrying her and having her grow and move around inside me... Lily is a happy memory, it's about time too! Lol

I have decided we need a bigger house... one with at least 4 bedrooms... 4 bedrooms inside that is... in the same area we are in... so if anyone wants to give us one, let me know!!!! :D I am ready to sell this one and buy a new one... ok it doesn't have to be NEW... just needs to be bigger and have a dishwasher! Easy right? wrong, not a heap in our price range... not that I even know what our price range is... lol. We love having people in our home but it needs to be bigger!

Anyway, today was mine and Luke's last day off together without the kids for awhile... Next week I am back at work making my weekend Saturday/Sunday, and Luke's weekend Sunday/Monday... 

The positive of the day...
~*~ Heidi baby sitting so I could go to a staff meeting... man what a boring day! :D Thanks Heidi! ~*~

And I am thankful for......
~*~ Luke passing his kidney stone! No operation necessary! ~*~

Sarah. :)