Has this experience changed me? Of course, hugely. I don’t
know really how to explain just how this experienced has changed me but let’s
see…
This experience quickly taught me the importance of
people and to cherish them. This experience taught me all about a whole new kind
of love. Lily is my first born. Before Lily I wasn’t a mum, but the moment I
knew she existed a part of me was growing. I believe I had to make more hard
decision about life, Lily’s and ours, in the 8ish short months she was with us,
than many parents have to make throughout their lives as parents. I learned what it meant to battle in your
head and heart about the life altering decisions you have to make about someone
elses life. I learned there was a love so strong it is there in an instant and
it does not go away. I developed an understanding of the love my parents had
for me. They may never have had to make life/death decisions for me, but I
began to understand that, no matter what, their love was unfaltering. I became
a mum and that is a pretty huge change to a person and I knew that no matter
what, from that moment, I would be a mum for the rest of my life.
Through losing Lily, I came to appreciate time, other
peoples and my own. I am open minded and try my best to be forgiving. But at
the same time, I am not ready to waste my time on rubbish or things that leave
me feeling like rubbish.
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