Thursday, March 17, 2016

Happy 5th Birthday

My dear Lily Tyne,
Today is a hard one, probably the hardest one yet, maybe because you are now the big 5 but we don’t get to help you do all the things we normally would when someone turns 5?
As I have always said, I would do it all again even if we knew how it would end, you were worth it! And I have come to realise, if I could do it again, there isn’t much (in my control) that I would even change! But if I could do it again, I wouldn’t put you down, I would ensure you were always in the arms of someone who loved you, until the very last moment. I know no amount of holding you would have been enough, but I don’t know why I let you lie there.
I don’t’ know how you celebrate birthdays in heaven, but I hope there is someone there today to give you an extra big cuddle and kiss from me.
There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t think about you. Zeke has been talking about you a lot too, he drew a very cool picture of you the other day, did you see it?
Today I really wish I could hold you tight and wish you happy birthday, but instead I will whisper it in the wind and blow kisses extra hard in hopes they make it all the way to you.
You changed our lives and made me a mum. I will forever be thankful for the privilege of having you in our lives. How lucky we were to have something that made saying goodbye so hard!
Happy birthday my precious angel, you are always in my heart.
I love you.
Mum x